Scene from a Morning Conversation

A: The closet is a terrible thing, and no one should have to live in the closet, but without the closet, Freddie Mercury never would have written "Fat Bottomed Girls."

B: Indeed.

A: How did anyone ever think Freddie Mercury was anything other than gay?

B: It was the Seventies. Everyone looked gay. And everyone was queer: Mick Jaggar, David Bowie. Even straight guys like Rod Stewart looked gay. Rod. Heheh.

A: Rod Stewart is way too gay to be anything but straight.